DON'T MAKE IT OWN YOU

If you hold onto the hurt you suffer inside the pain you keep shall never subside. You're forsaking a heart that's been breaking. You lived your life in sterile control. How does that not damage one's soul? You're aching from a heart that's been breaking. You need to release all of the pain. By holding on, you've nothing to gain. Don't make it own you. Don't suffer alone too. It's hard when the damage is done to go back to where it begun.                             - Sandra Wyllie I'm waking a heart that's been breaking. It's going to be hell that I pay. But I won't let you push me away. I'm taking a heart that's been breaking. You need to release all of the pain. By holding on, you've nothing to gain. Don't make it own you. Don't suffer alone too.

IT DIDN'T START WITH ME

It didn't start with me.
It happened long ago.
Why couldn't we see?
We just never let it go.

We can't go on
clinging to our past.
It's all over now.
It didn't last.

Give me one more chance
to make things right.
A lesson learned
prevents another fight.

It didn't start with me.
But I guess I took it on.
I couldn't free
the demons that held strong.

We can't go on
clinging to our past.
It's all over now.
It didn't last.
Give me one more chance
to make things right.
A lesson learned
prevents another fight.

It didn't start with me.
But I share the same shame.
We both agree
neither one of us is to blame.

We can't go on
clinging to our past.
It's all over now.
It didn't last.
Give me one more chance
to make things right.
A lesson learned
prevents another fight.

                  by Sandra Wyllie

 

LET IT HAPPEN TO YOU

Let lips part
to wear a smile.
Not be fraught in words
that run a mile.

Let eyes open wide
in pure delight.
Don't see the view
with narrow sight.

Let arms succumb
for an embrace.
Why stay stationary
in one place?

Let your mind drift
inside of a dream,
instead of being orderly
in the same regime.

Let your heart float
totally unaware,
instead of holding onto it
so afraid that it shall tear.

Let it happen to you
this mystery of life.
Don't allow it to be common!
It's far more than rife.
                       - by Sandra Wyllie

 

A HEART IN FULL BLOOM

Some people are so sadly mistaken. They don't see a heart that is breaking as one that's alive, one fully waken!   There is nothing alive in a heart that is closed; Life only exists in one completely exposed. And even in sorrow and even in pain a hearts capacity to love shall never thee wane. For a broken heart has even more room, It's petals are spread; it's a rose in full bloom!   You see that's what makes a heart real. It has weeped, it has bled; it has learned how to feel.                        - by Sandra Wyllie

I ALWAYS GET IN YOUR WAY

There must be some understanding. Where do I ever find the truth? Maybe you just see me as demanding. And maybe I only see you as uncouth. I don't always know how to please you. I don't always know what to say. It seems no matter what I do I always get in your way. It's hard to always know the right thing. The situation we gots a bit strange. I hope I'm not just a passing fling. I hope that soon something will change. I don't always know how to please you. I don't always know what to say. It seems no matter what I do I always get in your way. You never tell me that you love me. I never know just where I stand. It's so hard to live without the answers 'cause the questions get so out of hand. I don't always know how to please you. I don't always know what to say. It seems no matter what I do I always get in your way.                         by Sandra Wyllie

LOVE WEATHERS ALL STORMS!

Love weathers all storms.
It comes to you
in many forms.

Not always a warm
caressing, gentle breeze.
In fact it can be
an agonizing tease!

Awakens you like
rolling thunder in the night.
Props you up,
through blinded sight.

Torrid is the burning sun,
peeling away the layers
of your skin
as morning creeps in like a nun.

Exposing you like the bitter cold.
How it has you in its hold!

Tear streaming icicles
upon your face.
Frozen are you in its embrace.

Caught in the middle
of the eye.
It's a rage of destruction
as it passes by.

Whipping, whirling, upheaving,
bless be thou; it's never leaving!
But how I give a mighty hearty laugh,
because I so do love
to bask in its aftermath!

               by Sandra Wyllie


 

THE STAIN

You grew up as a stain, a blotch that spread and couldn't self-contain. Whereas purity lies in the heart, yours was broken from the start. Dirtied and laundered, still soiled in fearful disdain you recoiled.   Loves wounds unseen can never be washed away clean!   You've lived life trying so hard to scour when deep inside you have not of the power.   And doesn't it bring you such pain To always be wearing THE STAIN

           by Sandra Wyllie

Life

The best and worst thing of life.

 

The worst thing of my life

Someone’s eyes are filled with tears

owing to my behaviour , words or act;

 

The best thing of  my life

Someone’s eyes are filled with tears because

I am in trouble.

Self-Freedom

सम्पूर्ण स्वतंत्रता

क्या आप तनाब में रहते हैं? क्या आप अपने भविष्य के बारे में इतना सोचते हैं कि अपने बर्तमान का आनन्द भी नहीं ले पाते ? तनाब का सबसे बड़ा कारण जो हमारे पास है उसका आनंद न ले कर जो नहीं है उसके बारे में सोचते रहना व उन लोगो से तुलना करना जिनके पास है।  हमेशा याद रखें की खुश रहना एक सोच है धन दौलत और दुनियावी पदार्थो से मन की  शांति नहीं मिलती।  अकेले बैठ कर सोचें की जो विचार आ रहे हैं बह मन को शांत कर रहे हैं या अशांत कर रहे हैं। 

दुनिया में सबसे बड़ा दुःख का कारण राग और द्वैष है।  दुनिया बैसी जैसे हम ने मन में अपने ज्ञान और बुद्धि से  बनाई है।

क्या आप बार बार अपने भूतकाल यानि बीते हुए समय के बारे में सोचते हैं ? नकारत्मक या सकारत्मक।

सकारत्मक में पुरानी खूबसूरत यादेँ  जैसे आपकी उपल्बधियों की यादें या कहानिंयाँ , आपके रंगीन और हसीन तजुर्बे।  आपके साहसिक कारनामे  आदि।

नकारत्मक  में अपराध बोध (guilt )अहम (pride ) आक्रोष , क्रोध, पश्चात्ताप या आत्म दया आदि।

यदि आप ऐसा सोचते हैं तो आप केवल अपने झूठे भूतकाल को ही अपनी सोच में बार बार बैठा रहे हो बल्कि अपने बुढ़ापे को भी समय से पूर्व दस्तक दे रहे हो।

यदि इसको जाँचना चाहते हैं तो अपने इर्द गिर्द किसी को देखें जो इस तरह से भूतकाल में डूबा रहता है।

दुनिया खुश लोगों से मिलना पसंद करती है।  इसका प्रमाण T.V पर कॉमेडी सीरियल को देखें।  बहां देखने बालों की संख्या अधिक होती है।

कुछ लोग जो तनाब ग्रस्त रहते हैं उनका कारण एक और भी है।  वह हमेशा सोचते रहते हैं की बह लाइलाज वीमारी से ग्रस्त हैँ।  एक बार डॉक्टर से चेक उप करवा कर उसी प्रेस्क्रिशन पर कई कई साल दूकान बालों से बही पर्ची दिखा कर दवाई कहते रहते हैं।  जैसे पोदे को यदि अधिक पानी डाल दिया जाये तो पोदा सड़ जाता है कुछ इसी तरह से बिना डॉक्टर की सलाह से ली दवाई करती है।


क्या आप भूतकाल के बहुत से पल पल डर के मर रहे हैं?

आपको ऐसा करने की जरूरत नहीं है।  केवल उसी समय भूतकाल को सन्दर्व मे ले जब इसकी जरूरत है।

पल में जीने की शक्ति को बढ़ावा दीजिये।  भूतकाल या भबिष्य काल के बारे में न सोचें।  पल बर्बाद तो बभिष्य बरबाद खुशियाँ बरवाद।

बर्तमान के पल में अपनी सम्पूर्ण स्वतंत्रता का आनंद लें। 

क्या आप चिन्तित रहते हैं? हमेशा if what के विचार आते रहते हैँ ? अपने आप को इनसे ऊपर उभारे। आप कर सकते हैं यह संभव है मैंने किया हैं।  मैं अब खुश हूँ। . अब ऐसा लगता है जिअसे भूतकाल एक सपना था सब बीमारीआं सपना थी  10 -15 साल का एक समय ऐसा लगताथा जैसे अब जीवन समापत  हो गया है।  परन्तु अपने देव में  विश्वास के सहारे आज लगता है जैसे वह एक सपना था और अव अनंत जीवन खुशीआं ही खुशीआं हैं। में आशावादी हूँ।

आपकी पहचान आपके मन से है। जो भूतकाल या भविष्य की कल्पनाओं में खोया रहने में मग्न रहना पसन्द करता है।

आप इस तरह की सिथति से मुकाबला कभी नहीं कर सकते क्यूंकि यह यथार्थ तो है नहीं केवल कल्पना है अपने मन से बनाया हुआ भूत है।  तो इसका इलाज़ कहाँ होगा।  केवल आप ही खुद इसका इलाज़ कर सकते है।  आप का सकते हैं।  आप अपने विचारों के मालिक हैं।  नकारत्मक िचारों।  को सकारत्मक बना सकते है। All is well . सभ कुछ ठीक है  का 108 बार दोहराने से मन में शांति भरे सकूँ भरे विचार आने शुरू हो जाते हैं।  शरीर ठीक होना शुरू हो जाता हैं।  21 दिन में बहुत अन्तर आ जाता है।  कर के स्वय महसूस करें।  नकारत्मक लोगो से बात न करें।  केवल चुपचाप करें।


अपने साँसों के बारे में सतर्कता बरतें।  सांस शरीर को ऊर्जा देते हैं जैसे पेट्रोल स्कूटर , कार आदि को ऊर्जा देता है।  साँसों को धीता गहरा लें और ऑंखें बंद कर के शरीर में रहने दें केवल सांस पर ध्यान दें और महसूस करें की शरीर में सांस कहाँ कहाँ जा रहा है।  मुख से अन्दर शरीर के ले जाएँ आँखें बंद रखें 2 से 5 मिनट तक सांस शरीर में रखें फिर नाक की तरफ से छोड़ दें।  बहुत हल्का महसूस होगा।  कुछ दिन करने से आप महसूस करेंगे की आपका क्रोध करना और स्वाभिक चिड़चिडा पन  कम  हो गया है।







 

Congratulations

CONGRATULATIONS

                TO

Dr. TERRI HELLYAR

     brilliant daughter

of  Mr. & Mrs. Hellyar

on her starting  corporate

career.

Prof P.K.Keshap

 

Founding Member Education Consultants of India.

 

 

Dreams

सीढ़ियाँ तो उनके लिए है 
िजनेह छत  पर जाना है 

मेरी मंज़िल तो आसमान है 
मुझे रास्ता खुद बनाना है 

Stairs are for those whose  dream is to reach the roof ;
My goal is to reach the sky and I myself  have to craft the way to the sky .


Means small dreams have ready made ways to achieve
But for BIG DREAMS  you need to craft the way

 

Happiness

Quote of the Day

“Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.”

Robert Brault

“छोटी छोटी बातों में आनन्द खोजना चाहिए, क्योंकि एक दिन ऐसा आएगा जब आप पिछले जीवन के बारे में सोचेगें तो यह पाएंगे कि वह कितनी बड़ी बातें थीं।”
राबर्ट ब्राउल्ट

स्ट्रेस्ड हो तो कोई कॉमेडी सीरियल देखो डेस्ट्रेस्सेड हो जाओगे।  डेली सोप नहीं। 

As Man Thinketh

Man is made or unmade by himself.

 

In the armoury of thought he forges the weapons which he destroys himself.

 

 He also fashions the tools with which he builds himself heavenly mansions of joy, strength and peace.

 

By the right choice and true application of thought, man ascends to the divine perfection.

 

By the abuse and wrong application of  thought, he descends below the level of beast.

 

- James Allen in As a Man Thinketh.

Sandra Wylie

"SHE'S WITH YOU IN A DIFFERENT WAY"

It's often sad when love grows up.
But a dog can't stay a pup.
Change is inevitably true.
Growth shall surely ensue.
Your little girl went away.
But look closer
she's with you in a different way.

To everything comes an end.
Every ending is another beginning, my friend.
That's the way life evolves.
In short, parts of it slowly dissolves.
Your little girl went away.
But look closer
she's with you in a different way.

You can't hold on for too long.
Love is free, it's roots strong.
The baby bird shall leave the nest
and be free to pursue its own quest.
Your little girl went away.
But look closer
she's with you in a different way.

You gave her wings to fly.
That is the gift of saying goodbye.
Those same wings will make her come back to you
in ways you never knew!!
Your little girl went away.
But look closer
she's with you in a different way.

The spirits riding high;
death shall not deny.
Your love is in her wholly absorbed.
And through this, eternally you are restored.
You didn't go away.
Look Closer
you're with her in a different way.


"SOUL SURVIVING SAVIOR"

Someone else's actions
have no bearing on my own.
I am me, an entity,
and shall take it so stolidly
that which is spewed or thrown.
I need not look to others
to seek their satisfation,
nor may others stir
my emotion, and thus
produce a negative reaction.

I am solely responsible
for my own behavior
in any given situation.
I can only help myself,
I am my soul surving savior.

 

         Writer: SANDRA WYLIE, USA

Half Won't Do

Don't you want something better?
Maybe I'm not a go getter.
Half won't do.
What's wrong with you?
You got only one life.
Why fill it with strife?
Half won't do.
What's wrong with you?
Don't you deserve it?
Go get it!~
Half won't do.
What's wrong with you?

Posted by:

Sandra Wyllie  

Civilized Society

जो समाज सज्जनों का सम्मान नहीं करता


                 और


दुर्जनो को दंड नहीं देता

              बह

समाज संसार से जल्दी ही लुप्त

            हो

जाता है। 


सभय समाज ऐसी व्यवस्था से लाभांतित रहते हैं। 

World Class University

Dr. Kamlesh Misra

Vice Chancellor, Experienced Higher Education Specialist, Education Administrator, Turnaround Specialist

WORLD CLASS UNIVERSITY: AN INDIAN MIRAGE

June 15, 2014

 

Over the past few months I have met a lot of people from the field of academics & business and have heard a lot about building a world class university. In fact everyone in the private sector in India wants to build a world class university. Sadly they don’t even understand what it takes to build such a university. They seem to feel as if it is something that is kept in a place and you can just go and get it and become a world class university. I do not feel that India’s private sector is still ready to build even a good university let alone a world class university. So what will it take for the private sector or even the government of India to build one such university? Although the basic foundations of building a world class university remain the same irrespective of whether it is public or private, in this piece I will focus on the private sector.

The private sector in India is in the field of education for the purpose of profit motive but unfortunately education that is driven only by profit motive cannot become world class. The basic foundation on which universities are built by private sector in India are flawed and ridden with too much baggage to start with. The investments made are too small to lead to the creation of a great university. Most private universities start with 20 to 30 acres of land and a few buildings with no endowment funds to meet the start-up cost or the operating cost of the university for the first few years. Since they are self financed universities, they have to rely on the fees collected from the students as their only source of income in absence of any endowment funds. The pressure to get as many students as possible to generate a revenue flow leads to lower quality of student intake and the cycle of decline gets planted on day one of its operation. I think this is the worst thing to start with if the objective is to build a world class university.

We have to remember that world class universities are built by hardcore academicians and not by business men. Great universities have a great vision for high quality education which always translates into high quality students and faculty members. The academic orientation of the university is lost as soon as the above condition is overlooked for the short-term financial gain of a few hundred thousand rupees or the inability to travel the difficult road ahead.

The inability to pump in sufficient funds leads to cost cutting to the extent that quality of education gets compromised. There is a tendency to hire faculty who are willing to work for low salaries and that brings in the second wave of problems for the university. It is true that there is a shortage of good faculty in India but this is also true to the rest of the world as well. But the private sector many times is not looking for high quality faculty, they are looking at faculty who can teach and reduce the cost of delivery of the degree programs. A new cycle of incompetency breeds incompetency sets into the administrative system of the university and an overall decline begins to take place.

Then all of a sudden the corporate office of the promoting business begins to feel that they can do a better job than the people from the field of academics and they descend on to the university like a swarm of bees. They question everything as they have no idea of how and what academics is all about. Businesses have a tendency to bring all that is bad in the field of business to the university. They start with the assumption that everyone is dishonest. This is a big mistake, people in the field of academics are largely still the most honest people. They slowly begin to make all the decisions but will always find someone who they can shift all the blame when things go wrong. Such a practice leads to a culture of mistrust between the management and the academic community. Loss of faith leads to departure of the good academicians from the university as they would not waste their time and energy in a cause that is not their cup of tea.

Added to this is what I call the “I KNOW IT ALL SYNDROME”. This is a bad situation for university administration where the academic community begins to get treated as clerks and every morning and evening they have to report as to what they have accomplished today and the task for the next day is assigned. This is happening in many universities even today. Teachers are given the feeling that they are not working as they are always seen reading books. What a tragedy that enhancement of knowledge is not considered as work. There is a complete loss of autonomy of the university and quality takes a back seat.

So what should be done to create a world class university in India?

1. The amounts of resources that are required to create world class universities are too high and there is no quick return on it. In India if a world class university is to come up it will require a land area of about 400 acres with construction cost of about Rs. 500 crore and an endowment of Rs. 500 crore.

2. The management of the university has to rest in the hands of a very active board where members of the board are concerned about the future of the university and not being in the good books of the promoters. This is very unlikely as most board members are just show pieces used for decoration.

3. There has to be a very strong base of national and international faculty who has interest in teaching, research and academic administration. Unfortunately this type of faculty is becoming a rare breed in India and more so in the private sector.

4. There has to be complete autonomy to the university and it should not be controlled by the corporate office of the promoting business house. This is a very expensive gamble that almost all private universities get involved with. Great Universities run on clearly defined systems and processes but they cannot be geared to the whims and fancies of the promoting company.

5. The culture of Great Universities is that of intellectual freedom. They all have a secular character and are open to debates and differences in the though process. Every idea has a place in the university system. Thus world class universities cannot be built on a set ideology as that restricts the ability to create new knowledge.

6. Teaching institutions can never become world class universities. Research and creation of new knowledge is an important aspect in the life of a world class university.

Happy Reading: Would love to have your comments and views…

Posted by:

Dr. Kamlesh Misra

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अकल

अकल

मैं अपने दोस्त के घर बैठा था।  उसी समय उसकी छोटी बहन अपना सामान और अपने बच्चों को लिए कमरे से निकली और मेरे दोस्त यानि अपने भाई को कहा "अच्छा भैया मैं चलती हूँ " "अभी इतनी जल्दी?" मेरे दोस्त ने कहा।

"बिबाहित लड़कियां अपने ससुराल में ही अच्छी लगती है उनका ससुराल ही उनका मायका होता है।  कहते हैं न कि कदर खो देता है रोज का आना जाना।  दो तीन दिन से ज्यादा मायके में रहो तो लोग बातें करने लग जाते है "

"है तू मेरे से छोई पर बातें बड़ी अकल की करती है " मेरा दोस्त और में खड़े हो गए।  बहन ने बड़े प्यार से हमें आलिंगन किया और चल दी।  आँखों में आंसू थे।  कानो में उसकी अकल से भरे शब्द।  हम दोनों ने उसका सामान उठाया और उसे स्टेशन तक छोड़ने चले गए।


If you want to go quickly, go alone.
If you want to go far, go with others.
              - African Proverb.

Patience pays:

धीरे धीरे रे मना धीरे सब कुछ हो
माली सीचे सौ घड़ा रुत आये फल हो
 

Knower Vs. Learner

Mithilesh Chudgar - Inventor of Readography

Make Learning Stress Free for your students

Knowers V/s Learners

June 15, 2014

 

In times of change, the learners will inherit the Earth while the knowers will find themselves beautifully equipped to deal with a world that no longer exists.

- Eric Hoffer (1902 - 1983)

We have been revolving round the “knowers”, our only concern has always been producing “knowers” and we have valued their knowledge as the end.

With changing times our focus now has to be producing learners, who can adopt to change easily and perform in diverse conditions.

Let us look at some of the distinct points of knowers and learners;

1. Knowers see learning as destination; learners see learning as a journey.
2. Knowers go for certainty; learners go for possibility
3. Knowers see their truth as the only truth; learners are open to others’ views
4. Knowers base their Self Image on being right; learners base theirs on contribution
5. Knowers are not able to overcome fear easily as they do not admit their shortcomings or are not ready to admit that they do not know everything; Learners overcome fears with relative ease, as they readily admit their shortcomings and are open to learn new things.
6. Knowers cannot be wrong, so if they make a mistake they find someone or something to blame; learners can make mistakes, admit they do not have all the answers and continue to be a part of the solution
7. Knowers find it difficult to adopt to change and become weaker, less effective and less influential over time; learners readily adopt, become stronger, more effective, and more influential

I have found that I am a knower in some aspects and a learner in some aspects, and after working with number of people have realized that this is true for everyone and one can become a learner from a knower.

Learners excel in business, Corporate are looking for learners, in every aspect of life learners consistently keep growing.

Now the big question;

Are we producing knowers or learners in our education system?

LIVE LIFE KING SIZE

राजा जैसा जीवन कैसे जिएं ?

हम सभी थोड़ी सी कोशिश करें तो अपने मन पसंद का जीवन जी सकते है। जिसमे हँसी हो ख़ुशी हो। प्रयतन करें सभ कुछ संभव है।  पर्यटन लगातार करें कियूंकि जीवन हमारा है जीना हमें है। 

जीवन में से दिमागी परेशानी से बचने के लिए :

1 लालच पर लगाम लगाएं': मन की आँखों (आँखें बंद करके ) सोचें कि जितना संघर्ष कर रहा हूँ उतना में जीवन में भोग भी लूँगा या छोड़ कर चला जायूँगा।  दूसरे कहीं इकठा करते करते ही जीवन लीला समापत न हो जाये और जो पाया है उसे भोग ही न सकूँ।  इसका ज्ञान होते ही इंसान के आतम चक्षु उसे ज्ञान बान की तरह व्यव्हार करने के लिए सतर्क कर देते हैं।  कर्म करना धर्म है परन्तु धर्म से कर्म न करना पैशाचिक है।  इससे मनुष्य स्वयं से ही अप्रसन रहता है और अपने साथ रहने बाले सभी सदस्यों व् दोस्तों को ही अपनी अप्रसन्त्ता का कारण समझ कर अपने स्वर्ग जैसे जीवन को नरक की तरह जीता है।

2. इच्छाओं के गुलाम नहीं मालिक बने :  मन इच्छाओं का भंड़ार है एक की पूर्ति करो तो दूसरी मुंह खोले आगे खड़ी हो जाती है। इनको लिख कर देखिये।  केवल दिमाग से सोचने से यह पहाड़ लगने लगती है।  परन्तु लिखने से आप देखेंगे की यह उतनी गंभीर नहीं थीं जितना तनाब बना हुआ था।  दूसरों को न बताएं।  जरूरते व् इच्छाएं आपकी है स्व इनका हल ढूंढे।  अब इन इच्छाओं की पूर्ति के लिए एक समयबद्ध प्रोग्राम बनायें।  कौन सी इच्छा पहले पूरी करनी है कौन सी 2 नंबर और कौन सी तीन नंबर पर।  और इसी पर्कार सभी को क्रम प्रधान करें। एक से दो साल का प्रोग्रामबनायें।  सभी इच्छाएं एक ही बार में पूरी नही की जा सकती।  यह तो बैसा है जैसा किसी धर्मस्थल पर सभी श्र्धालू लाइन न बनाकर एक ही समय में दर्शन करना चाहते हों।  इस लिए अपनी इच्छाओं की सूची (लिस्ट ) बनायें।  उसके उपरांत उनकी पूर्ति के लिए प्रोग्राम।  एक लड़की ने अपनी लिस्ट मे15 साल की आयु में 140 कार्य करने की लिस्ट बनाई और 47 साल की उम्र में यह लिस्ट समापत हो गई।  इस लिए उसे फिर से अपने भविष्यके लिए कार्यों की लिस्ट बनानी पड़ी।  अधिकतर मनुष्य कार्यों की  लिस्ट नहीं बनाते बल्कि लिस्ट को अपने मस्तिष्क में ही बनाये रखते हैं।  यही उनके तनाब का , रुग्णता का कारण बन जाता है। डॉक्टर के सलाह पर पता चलता है कोई रोग नहीं है परन्तु मन रोगमुक्त होता नहीं।  शरीर की आरोग्ता के लिए मन का आरोग्य होना अति आवश्यक है।                प्रयोग में लाएं।  लाभ पाएं।



 

KING SIZE LIFE

Live Life

King Size

 

This is an article by Renee Singh – a Chandigarh based psychoanalyst published in The Tribune, 10^th June, 2014 . I adore her a lot as her articles make me aware about my shortcoming to reach my goal of attaining “full happiness” and burst stress.

 

We can all have a little fun in our lives to make us feel better.

 

Rather having fun actually needs to be a regular occurrence. There are a few relaxing social activities that can develop into regular habits and have loads of fun.

“Loosen up, lighten up” … is the mantra to de-stress. If we let ourselves just be and not try to be too analytical (I say avoid “petty analysis and live happier and longer) or critical of ourselves as well as others, we would definitely be happier.

 

“He who smiles rather than who rages is always the stronger”…..goes a Japanese saying.

 

TARGET HAPPINESS

Most people just flow along with life, taking it easy and allowing the flow to take over. This could work for some of us to some extent, but if you really want to enjoy life you have to create a mental self-disciplinary way. Set yourself  happiness targets and live up to them.

 

LIFT YOUR MOOD

Enjoying your life is not just simple indulgence. Getting more of what you enjoy into your life is a great way to bust stress, as it basically leads to a better frame of mind.

 

LAUGH IT OFF

With the right attitude, stress can easily roll away from your inner self. Cultivate the ability to laugh in the face of stress; this is a great way of enjoying life to the fullest as you are less affected by stress. A good laughter releases endorphins and other healthy hormones that relieve stress. Laughter leaves us with a positive and healthy frame of mind.

 

STRESS RELIEVERS

There are many great stress relievers though it is not very easy to stick to them. However, the fun stress relievers are easier to practice on regular basis. And you also look forward to them.

 

PLAY GAMES

 

Playing games whether it’s with adults or with kids is a great stress reliever. Games keep us in the present. Allow your inner child to play on a regular basis. If you are a parent, just make it a habit to enjoy with your children. Do everything in the day with a playful attitude and watch stress melt away.

 

BOOK YOURSELF

 

Books provide the right distraction and escape from stress. We can spend time with them at our own convenience and our own leisure.

 

GARDENING SPACE

 

Bonding with nature is a great way of re-connecting with your self. Beautifying your space helps in beating stress.

 

ARTISTIC NOTE

Re-discover your artistic side. Doodling, painting and sketching help you express yourself; unleash the bottled up emotions from within.

 

FRIENDLY TIES

This is one of the most relaxing practices. It is only with your friends that you can let your hair down and just be yourself.

 

TELL JOKES

One can forward messages that are funny and these make you chuckle or even laugh.

 

CLEAR THE CLUTTER

This may not sound like a fun activity but less clutter would mean less stress in the environment which helps ease your mood.

 

REMAIN IN PRESENT

 

The Basing yourself firmly in the present moment helps in de-stressing. There is a long list of things that can help you beat the stress. See what appeals to you and just go for it!

                       (Ranee is a Chandigarh(India) based            

                                                                           psychoanalyst)