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Tuesday, February 9, 2016

STRESS BUSTER







STRESS BUSTER

No complaints, please!

Making our lives better and happier is our prime motive, and we feel the need to make a conscious effort towards it.

Since, the commitment is to our own selves, so, only we are responsible.

We have to look into our lives and see what would make the biggest impact.

We need to give up certain ways and habits and take on something we could continue doing to bring about a positive change in our lives.

Here, I am going to give you a list of a few things you should stop doing so that life becomes blissful and stress free.

STOP COMPLAINING:

Complaining is actually a way of finding fault with everything around you. You build up lot of negativity your system which affects you adversely.

·      Complaining keeps you in stuck in ‘problem mode” and inaction.
·      It spreads negativity to others.
·      A form of rumination.
·      Makes frustration seem more intense and chronic.
·      Keeps magnifying problems.
·      Not really an effective way to feeling better.

Minimize junk food intake.

Poor diet increases stress. Monitor junk going inside your system. Too much caffeine can become exhausting. Emotional exhaustion can cause depression. It is important to give up poor eating habits to rejuvenate your system and get rid of stress from your life.





Making comparisons:
It’s human nature to compare. In the age of social media, it is easy to slip into comparisons. Competitive friendships are common. If we think we are in any way less than our friends, we don’t feel good and this creates stress.

Unrealistic expectations

Real sources of stress in our lives are unrealistic expectations from our own self and from others around us. This generates a sense of lack and disappointment within us.

Safeguard sleep

One of the major causes of stress is not getting enough sleep.  This can lead to a lot of stress. Sleep helps you feel more empowered, better equipped to solve problems and enjoy your life with a stress free mind.

Jumping to conclusions

Many times in life you can react without having all the facts and jump to conclusions. We can assume the worst about others. We like to imagine we are mind readers. We start reacting without knowing the facts.

So, we need to give up the negatives and pick up on the positives in order bring ourselves to a level of happiness we desire.

Note: This is a write up Rene Singh, a Chandigarh based psychotherapist.

The article has appeared on Life & Style page of The Tribune dated 9th February, 2016 published from Chandigarh (India).

I am sharing it for the benefit of my brothers, sisters, children throughout the world.

Pic courtesy: www.livehardplayharder.com
www.myhousecallmd.com

Wednesday, January 27, 2016

How to take exam stress free?



Pic courtesy: http//: samandeeprana.blogspot.com
EXAM PHOBIA

HOW TO HANDLE THE EXAM OR COMPETITION?

DO’S AND DON’T’S FOR PARENTS AND STUDENTS.

Exams create stress for parents and students alike. But if certain precautions and self-discipline is practiced, handling  exams or competitions does not become a stress for parents or students.

Student’s role:

  1. Daily routine is the key to success in any exam or competition. Planning is very important. Execution of the planning makes the job of preparation easier. No body can work in two day's. Today is called  "present". "Present" means gift from the creator called God.

  1. Self-loading planning with following format helps a lot:

           PLAN YOUR WORK, WORK YOUR PLAN.

           I AM INTELLIGENT. I AM BRILLIANT. I WILL ACHIEVE MY GOAL.  I am responsible for my career and life.
Date:__________
Subject
Chapter
Name      Pages   
Start Time
Finish Time
Delay in achieving the goal if any and new finish time




































Exercise done/not done
Healthy eating
Done/not done
Good Music
Listened/not listened







































Good body possesses healthy mind. You are a mind attached to body not vice versa. So, make the mind healthy. Do PT (physical training) as is done in schools. Cycling helps energise mind. I do static cycling - 100 pedals forward, 100 pedals backward. It energises me for the work of the day.  Otherwise I feel lousy during the day.
  1. Be present mentally and physically for study.  Be honest. Dishonesty in study does not pay. Don’t cheat yourself. Sincerity pays. Be sincere. Don’t read to explain to others but for yourself. The best gift to yourself is “education.” Be responsible to yourself not to reply to the comments of others: be it parents, elders, neighbours, friends or known people.  You are talented. Believe it.

  1. Don’t study for marks alone. Work hard, read sincerely and marks will follow. Comparison is hell. Never compare. Dr. Manmohan Singhji, the former Prime Minister of India says: Education is what is left after the student has long left the school/college/university.  My view: education works after 50+ of the age. So, educate yourself. Believe in learning. True leaders are insatiable readers and  learners.

  1. Don’t compete or compare yourself with others but with your previous performance.

  1. How to read:

6.1 Have a separate room for study. Room can be made of bamboos and thatched tarpauline. In one case, I asked a student who had not a separate room for study to erect a bamboo shed in the corner of his house. He had failed in + 2. But after following the instructions and changing his priority he got 80% marks in +2 and is now doing B.Tech. 

6.2 Stop mental distraction like watching TV, speaking unnecessarily or excessively with your friends or classmates physically or on mobile phone. This distracts the mind and discouraging feelings popup. Yes,  discussing a subject is good use of mobile phone and time.

              6.3 Discipline  yourself mentally and physically. Sleep well. Read well. Play well. But pay 100% attention to the activity you do. Focus matters in life. What you focus upon that grows. 
             6.4 Eat healthy light diet. Don't eat heavy diet. It makes you lousy. Lousy means wastage of time. Time is very valuable. Time once past cannot be recalled. I can't go back to the age of 25 years.

             6.5 Exercise daily. Cycling is good. Walking or PT is also good. But beware, you do not walk with the talkers. They distract. Think, plan and talk only about the subjects you wish to excel in.

              6.6 Refresh yourself by washing your face with warm/cold water when you feel tired.  Water has refreshing properties.
            6.7 Talk to positive people who encourage you not discourage you.
           6.8 ALWAYS REMIND YOURSELF: Winners don't care about hurdles in the race but keep their eye on the finish line.

  1. Prepare with the end benefits of the  education in your life.  FAIL = FIRST ATTEMPT IN LEARNING.  Don’t discourage yourself.  Many students overdo and do not like to face the failure. Failed means you are in the race. If you will prepare well, there is no question of failure. Guaranteed. Preparation is 99=exam 100   Result= Fail. Preparation 101 = Exam 100 Result = Pass.   Preparation is in your hand. Books are static. You are dynamic. You can increase your efforts. 

  1. Love to read at your best. Don’t let your mood  be the boss of your reading habits. Be the boss of your mood. In preparation is only you and your books. MIND IT: Mind is a good servant but very bad master. Be its master. Don't let it push you to work as it desires but  make it work for you.    If the horses of the chariot keep pushing the chariot as per their, the chariot will break. 

 Read the books thoroughly and you will find that you know 80% and just 20% you need to consult others.  Be the master of one book at least. Don't puzzle yourself by collecting lot of books on same subject. Every book has same material to teach. Focus on the subject rather than focusing on negative thoughts like: My school is not good, my teacher is not good, the way of teaching is not good, this book is good, that book is bad, my parents are not educated etc. etc. 
 Jot down what you wish to consult your teachers or senior students. Tell your parents: You pay fee, give food, give clothes and everything. Learning is my responsibility. I will do the best.  Pray and work.  

Touch feet of your parents. Parents are visible God and God is invisible parents i.e. your ancestors. Pray to them and no power on Earth can make you unsuccessful. Yes you need to read and work hard. Merely Prayer will not do.

  9.BELIEVE IN YOURSELF. TRUST YOURSELF.  DEVELOP AN ATTITUDE : YES I CAN!

PARENTS ROLE:

  1. Parents role is not limited upto paying fees and financing the child’s study.

  1. They should go beyond that.

  1. Don’t compare your child with others. Generally parents say: Geetu got 96% Raman got 98% and what about you? This taunt by parents hits and hurts the child’s psyche most.

  1. Mind it: Parents need children and children need parents. Don’t compare and make them hate you internally. Rather say: I believe you and trust you will do the best. Exam is a part of life not end of life. So, do your best and leave the rest to God.

 These are the morale boosting words. Once the parents these words, child starts working hard with “do or die” spirit.

  1. Do not give unnecessary advice. This disturbs the child.

  1. Especially for moms: Ask the child what the child wants to eat. Don’t cook what you want to cook but cook what is liked by the child. Whatever the child likes gives more mental energy.
  2. Honey, fruits, nuts, milk  are good for memory and mind sharpening.  Include them in the diet. Follow your child and treat the child like King during this period. Leave criticism for another occasion.

HOW TO STUDY FOR MORE MARKS AND EASY SUCCESS?

  1. Be mentally prepared saying to yourself i.e. self-talk (silently) I am braver than my exam. I can work hard and success will be hard. Don’t let study be your master but you be the master of your study.

  1. Don’t stress yourself but keep the stress under your control.

 Do deep breathing. Breathe in through nose for 4 secs, hold the breath for 8 seconds and exhale the breath with a blow through mouth in 4-5 seconds. You are refreshed to study.

  1. Mind it : LUCK FAVOURS THE BRAVE. You are brave. 

  1. Divide the study of one hour in 4 parts:   
 15 minutes read the headings of the chapter thoroughly. 
  1. 15 minutes closing eyes storm the brain to understand what you have read. 
3)
Re-read the chapter 4. Now write what you have read.    After every 30 minutes 5 minutes pause and leaving the chair and splashing the water on face pays.
  1. Mind Maps can be used for study and correlation of different topics read in the chapter. Read the whole book. It will make the learning easy. Don’t understand but read like a novel.  Always read with pencil  in hand. Keep on underling the difficult points. But do  not stop reading. Continue reading. You will see that only 10-20% you do not know, rest is known to you. Focus on what you know well.
  2. REVISION IS THE FATHER OF SUCCESS.
  3. Drink water many times. Water rejuvenates learning power.
  4. FEAR CARRIES 2 MEANINGS:  Fear = fear everything and run. Fear= Face everything and rise. So, don't fear but prepare and you will be successful beyond your expectations and excel others" expectations.

WISH YOU A GRAND SUCCESS

Note: I tried to insert the table at Plan your work, work your plan. But I could not do so. Please excuse. Draw yourself  and use this chart for checking the "daily progress". You will be happy to know your progress and your result will improve by more than 50% means if you are getting 45% marks they can go to 67% and 67% can be 95+.




EXAM PHOBIA

EXAM PHOBIA

HOW TO HANDLE THE EXAM OR COMPETITION?

DO’S AND DON’T’S FOR PARENTS AND STUDENTS.

Exams create stress for parents and students alike. But if certain precautions and self-discipline is practiced, handling  exams or competitions does not become a stress for parents or students.

Student’s role:

1.       Daily routine is the key to success in any exam or competition. Planning is very important. Execution of the planning makes the job of preparation easier.

2.       Self-loading planning with following format helps a lot:

           PLAN YOUR WORK, WORK YOUR PLAN.

           I AM INTELLIGENT. I AM BRILLIANT. I WILL ACHIEVE MY GOAL.  I am responsible for my career and life.

Subject
Chapter
Name      Pages  
Start Time
Finish Time
Delay in achieving the goal if any and new finish time




































Exercise done/not done
Healthy eating
Done/not done
Good Music
Listened/not listened








































3.       Be present mentally and physically for study.  Be honest. Dishonesty in study does not pay. Don’t cheat yourself. Sincerity pays. Be sincere. Don’t read to explain to others but for yourself. The best gift to yourself is “education.”

4.       Don’t study for marks alone. Work hard, read sincerely and marks will follow.

5.       Don’t compete or compare yourself with others but with your previous performance.

6.       How to read:

6.1 Have a separate room for study.

6.2 Stop mental distraction like watching TV, speaking unnecessarily or excessively with your friends or classmates. Yes discussing a subject is good use of mobile phone and time.

              6.3 Discipline  yourself mentally and physically. Sleep well. Read well. Play well.
             6.4 Eat healthy light diet.

             6.5 Exercise daily.

              6.6 Refresh yourself with washing your face with warm/cold water.  Water has refreshing properties.
            6.7 Talk to positive people who encourage you not discourage you.

      7. Prepare with the end benefits of the  education in your life.  FAIL = FIRST ATTEMPT IN LEARNING.  Don’t discourage yourself.  Many students overdo and do not like to face the failure. Failed means you are in the race. If you will prepare well, there is no question of failure. Guaranteed.

     8. Love to read at your best. Don’t let your mood  be the boss of your reading habits. Be the boss of your mood. In preparation is only you and your books.

 Read the books thoroughly and you will find that you know 80% and just 20% you need to consult others.

 Jot down what you wish to consult your teachers or senior students. Tell your parents: You pay fee, give food, give clothes and everything. Learning is my responsibility. I will do the best.  Pray and work.  

Touch feet of your parents. Parents are visible God and God is invisible parents i.e. your ancestors. Pray to them and no power on Earth can make you unsuccessful. Yes you need to read and work hard. Merely Prayer will not do.

  9.BELIEVE IN YOURSELF. TRUST YOURSELF.  DEVELOP AN ATTITUDE : YES I CAN!

PARENTS ROLE:

1.       Parents role is not limited upto paying fees and financing the child’s study.

2.       They should go beyond that.

3.       Don’t compare your child with others. Generally parents say: Geetu got 96% Raman got 98% and what about you? This taunt by parents hits and hurts the child’s psyche most.

4.       Mind it: Parents need children and children need parents. Don’t compare and make them hate you internally. Rather say: I believe you and trust you will do the best. Exam is a part of life not end of life. So, do your best and leave the rest to God.

 These are the morale boosting words. Once the parents these words, child starts working hard with “do or die” spirit.

5.       Do not give unnecessary advice. This disturbs the child.

6.       Especially for moms: Ask the child what the child wants to eat. Don’t cook what you want to cook but cook what is liked by the child. Whatever the child likes gives more mental energy.
7.       Honey, fruits, nuts, milk  are good for memory and mind sharpening.  Include them in the diet. Follow your child and treat the child like King during this period. Leave criticism for another occasion.

HOW TO STUDY FOR MORE MARKS AND EASY SUCCESS?

1.       Be mentally prepared saying to yourself i.e. self-talk (silently) I am braver than my exam. I can work hard and success will be hard. Don’t let study be your master but you be the master of your study.

2.       Don’t stress yourself but keep the stress under your control.

 Do deep breathing. Breathe in through nose for 4 secs, hold the breath for 8 seconds and exhale the breath with a blow through mouth in 4-5 seconds. You are refreshed to study.

3.       Mind it : LUCK FAVOURS THE BRAVE. You are brave. 

4.       Divide the study of one hour in 4 parts:   
 15 minutes read the headings of the chapter thoroughly. 
2. 15 minutes closing eyes storm the brain to understand what you have read. 
3)
Re-read the chapter 4. Now write what you have read.    After every 30 minutes 5 minutes pause and leaving the chair and splashing the water on face pays.
5.        Mind Maps can be used for study and correlation of different topics read in the chapter. Read the whole book. It will make the learning easy. Don’t understand but read like a novel.  Always read with pencil  in hand. Keep on underling the difficult points. But do  not stop reading. Continue reading. You will see that only 10-20% you do not know, rest is known to you. Focus on what you know well.
6.       REVISION IS THE FATHER OF SUCCESS.
7.       Drink water many times. Water rejuvenates learning power.

WISH YOU A GRAND SUCCESS

Pic courtesy: http//:samandeeprana.blogspot.com